lessons I wish I learnt five years back

Obscure now, obvious in hindsight

Image Credit: Ben White/ UnSplash.com

This is a random rambling – a reflection of nuggets collected over half a decade – lessons learnt, experience gained. Here’s a key realization – what’s obscure in the present becomes obvious in hindsight!

Here‘s a collection on work and general existence:

Lesson #1

Most things in life have many shades of grey. Accepting this fact is the first step in dealing with it effectively and gaining from it eventually.

Lesson #2

A few things in life are black-and-white. And you must insist on keeping them that way. Most of your pains and self-inflicted struggles will stem out of the inability or unwillingness to prevent grayness from creeping into what must remain clear-cut.

Lesson #3

Leadership and communication are always situational. The best answer to how you deal with any event is “it depends” – On the people involved, their station in life, your station in life, their level of humanness and maturity, your level of humanness and maturity.

Lesson #4

Related to 3 above, tact and diplomacy are important skills. The straight path may not be always the right one. Detours, roundabouts, long-winded routes are all part of the process.

Lesson #5

Related to 4 above, the need to be tactful doesn’t give you permission to breach ethics to get your thing done.

Lesson #6

People will respect your leadership to the extent you behave like a leader. People like to follow strong, decisive people. Not necessarily those with all the answers, but those that are willing to take charge of a situation and own it.

Lesson #7

You will come across many people who either dislike you, envy you or unable to recognize/ appreciate your work and abilities. Don’t let them creep into your mind-space at any time.

Lesson #8

Nothing is what it seems. If there’s one skill  that stands head and shoulders above all else, it’s the ability to see patterns, read between the lines, get inside others’ heads and notice subtleties  – in conversations, interactions, happenings, personal dynamics.

Lesson #9

There is an opportunity residing in everything. If you are flexible about rules and authority, and realize that the future is built on geometric progression and not simple arithmetic, you can ride on the back of any event and come out wildly successful. This also makes it easy to digest some unpleasant, uncomfortable decisions and idiosyncrasies of the present time.

Lesson #10

Related to 9 above, keep an open mind always.

Lesson #11

When dealing with people, always think in terms of what can be, not what is. Everyone’s on a journey. If you can visualize possibilities for yourself and others, you will be able to come up with new exciting ways of connecting the present to the future. Of course, this assumes compatible ethics and values.

Lesson #12

Always break boundaries. Expand the limits of your game. Play outside the norms. You become exceptional and valuable only by adding outrageous value uniquely.

Lesson #13

Establish personal boundaries that no one is allowed to breach. And then make them known. Others may resent you, but they will also learn to not dishonor borders.

Lesson #14

A word is a powerful thing. A magical gift. When you shower a thoughtful word of appreciation on someone, you cannot even imagine how deep that word travels inside them. Bring the gift of word to people who cross your path – in the form of a quality in them you noticed, a ‘thank-you’ or just a silent prayer or blessing in their direction. Who says ordinary mortals are not capable of magic?

Lesson #15

Don’t cage the eccentric in you. When you walk the unusual path, people will try to drag you back to “safety”. Those who love you don’t want you to get hurt, and haters wouldn’t want you to be exceptional. In either case, refuse the caged existence.

 

 

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